6 Things I Love to Do Solo That My Family and Friends Totally Judge Me For

I’m an only child, which invariably means I’m pretty skilled at being alone. Couple this with the fact that I lived on my own for most of my teen and young adult years, and you have the recipe for someone who views time alone as time well spent.

This is not to say I don’t enjoy the company of family and friends, or that I don’t look forward to date night, or seeing my writing group on Tuesdays. But there is nothing quite like me, myself, and I, hanging solo.

So, what do “we” get up to? Here are six things I love to do on my own that my family and friends think are pretty darn weird.

1. Going to the Movies

The first time I went to the movies alone, I was a teenager. I had planned to meet friends at the theatre, but at the last minute, both friends got stuck at home.ย That first time was a little strange, since going to the movies in our teen years is less about the actual show and more about hanging out. Since then, however, I’ve developed a taste for sitting alone with my buttery popcorn and blue icy. The last movie me, myself, and I saw together wasย Black Panther.

2. Working Out

I go to the gym at least once per week. Sometimes I drag family and friends along, but most times I go alone. Often, when men see me at the gym, they approach me under the pretext of seeking a gym partner, claiming they get more done when they have someone else with them.

“I wouldn’t make a very good gym partner, then,” I tell them. “Even when I take people with me, I work out alone. I prefer it that way.”

3. Snorkelling

I haven’t done this in years, but in Jamaica, snorkelling alone was one of those daredevil things I did on the weekends that drove my mother crazy. It may not sound like much, but snorkeling alone is actually quite dangerous. The smallest recommended outing is in groups of three.

So, why did I choose to go out on my own, especially since I’m not a strong swimmer? Snorkelling was one of the best things about living on a tropical island, but few of my friends were really into it, and those who were rarely made the time. So, I could spend ten years waiting for them, or I could go alone. I chose the latter.

4. Hiking

The new solo-activity which drives my mother absolutely crazy is hiking. I started out solo-hiking in Atlanta, and then eventually travelled all the way up to New England to hike in Massachusetts and New Hampshire on my own. My mother is convinced that sooner or later I’ll be kidnapped, robbed, or otherwise assaulted for being out and about as a female on my own.

That may be true, but a life lived beneath the shadow of fear is a life not lived. I love hiking with Tristan out west, and a date-day on the trails is always a good one, but there is a bit of peace in walking those trails alone sometimes that cannot be denied.

5. Attending Concerts & Music Festivals

The first music festival or concert I attended by myself was Vans Warped Tour in 2017. My mother was so concerned by this that she almost bought tickets to attend, though she cannot stand rock music. I assured her I was fine and that I was looking forward to going on my own. I had an amazing time.

Going with friends to a multi-stage festival is always great, but it was just as great not having to negotiate about what acts to see and when was lunch time. Since then, I have been to one other concert on my own, where I saw Hollywood Undead, Deadset Society and Misty Eyed. I plan to see a lot more this year, with or without company!

6. Dining Out

Of all the things I enjoy doing on my own, this is the one my friends seem to find the strangest. When I take myself out to dinner, I bring a book and my Bluetooth Keyboard, making a date with words. While I eat, I read, and in-between waiting on food and the check, I write.

The only time I ever felt watched was when I did this in New England on my solo-trip. The waitress at the table across from mine looked thoroughly confused, not only by the fact that I was out eating alone, but that I was having a good time doing it.

โ€”

Do you also take yourself out on play dates? What are some of the amazing things you’ve done on your own, or would love to try? Tell me all about it in the comments, below? PS:- Hanging out alone on the couch doesn’t count.ย ๐Ÿ˜

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75 thoughts on “6 Things I Love to Do Solo That My Family and Friends Totally Judge Me For

  1. I like your list. I have never snorkeled before but I am sure if I did I would be doing it by myself as well.
    What you do already have I do as well by myself and also add biking and going to the beach. Typically everything I do is alone.
    Not to say I don’t enjoy a partner in crime but I also really enjoy my alone time and most of the time I can’t get anyone to go with me. So it would be the same waiting for the end of times and never getting out and doing what I wanted in the first place.

    1. You would love snorkelling. You really should take a trip and give it a try. I’m taking a cruise this year and I will not let the opportunity miss me! ๐Ÿ˜„

      I have gone biking by myself, but not very far—just around the block a few times for exercise. I lump going to the beach in with snorkeling.

      Like you said, having a partner in crime is fun, but sometimes you just want the experience all to yourself. I feel like there is also so much more room for observation when we’re not distracted by company. It’s amazing what you notice on those days!

      1. I will have to try. I think there might be some opportunity in North Carolina where I just moved to.
        Thatโ€™s awesome you are going on a cruise. Where to?
        You should pick up the biking more. I am working on buying a better bike but still using what I have for exploration and that observation and inner stuff. Itโ€™s a good solo activity and then stopping whatever interest you.

      2. I doubt that, haha. Snorkelling is usually done on the Gulf side. The water is too murky on the east and west coast. Even in California, it was terrible. Doable, but not even half as good as snorkelling in the tropics. Our waters are crystal clear. You should try Florida if possible!

        I’ve forgotten exactly where the cruise goes. It will be in the Gulf coast and Caribbean though. I think Mexico and Grand Cayman are two of the stops.

        I don’t trust drivers in Atlanta, or I would bike more. They drive like their mad here lol.

    1. Ha! I never thought of it that way, but you’re right. I remember going hiking with a friend who had to spend half the time on the trail snapchatting. I’m not sure how I managed not to bop him in the head with a tree branch. I really wanted to.

  2. I prefer to work out alone. I have been out to eat and movies alone plenty of times. I prefer to hike with friends but one major plus of going alone is you can stop and take pictures and not have to worry about catching up with anyone or worry about them getting upset from you slowing them down. I apologize for the run-on sentence, but Iโ€™m not editing it. Lol Iโ€™ve never been to a concert or music festival alone, but Iโ€™ve been to many book festivals alone. Which I usually end up making friends while Iโ€™m there. ๐Ÿ˜Š I enjoy spending time with people, but sometimes I prefer to be by myself.
    But of course, I always catch hell for hiking alone. But Iโ€™m with you, canโ€™t let fear hold us back. Just be cautious and aware and be as careful as we can and enjoy life. I hope no editors are reading this comment. The grammar police are going to fine me for this mess. ๐Ÿ’ต
    Have a good weekend. ๐ŸŒž

    1. Haha, if the grammar police start attacking comments on my blog, they will be disciplined. ๐Ÿ˜‚

      I totally agree on the benefits of being able to stop and take pictures when hiking alone, especially since I usually blog about my hikes. But mostly I just enjoy the quiet time to think.

      I’ve never been to a book festival. I’m not sure my bank account could handle that. ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

      1. We have quite a few in the surrounding areas. Decatur and Milton are the first two that come to mind. Canton had a big arts type festival that included lots of books. It was mainly focused on music this year, but last two years they had different authors doing panels, answering questions and doing giveaways, and of course selling books. I have learned a lot and made lots of friends. And obviously bought lots of books. ๐Ÿ˜Š I participated in the Milton one last year and the Allatoona one the year before.

      2. Participated as an author, you mean? What’s the cost and process usually like to register? A few people have suggested it to me, but I never really looked into it.

      3. Yes, participated as an author. I think $25 or $35. Usually just fill out a form and email it in. One of the ones I was on a panel for, I didnโ€™t have to pay to register.

      4. That’s not bad at all! I was expecting something in the $100 range at least.

  3. Culturally or something, hiking is one of those things that sort of sounds more dangerous for women than men…

    That said, my girlfriend has hiked many many more miles solo than I have.

    I think there’s a perception of a danger there based on male vs female. Intellectually, I suspect there is an actual danger for all sexes of being far away from help in general regardless of danger. (disclaimer, my girlfriend just broker her arm gardening last weekend, slipped off a retaining wall, so there’s danger anywhere, but it was lucky that my son and I were around the corner.)

    On a much more personal note, I have gone to concerts solo before (soon after my separation) and it was a very positive and healing kind of thing. I grew a lot, and made a point to meet strangers, and did. ๐Ÿ™‚ Danced with a few as well.

    One of my goals is to get to more movies solo. There’s some sort of monthly movie pass that I’ve heard of that costs $10 a month and lets someone go to as many movies as they like. I think I’m going to try that soon!

    I’m definitely a loan wolf exerciser. Run alone, exercise alone mostly. I go to yoga regularly, but I rarely bring friends or family with. In fact, I mostly go to yoga to get my friends and family out of my head!

    1. Hey Brett. Thanks for sharing this!

      I do believe that there are more dangers for women than men. Women are easier targets, and women generally do not attack others. Violent crime, including robbery, kidnapping and rape, is mostly a man’s domain. So, unfortunately, it is much more dangerous for us to travel and hike alone. But like I said, a life lived beneath the shadow of fear is a life not lived.

      I’ve never heard of this movie pass before. I don’t go often but there’s one close to my gym, so maybe it would be worth it. Do you know the name of the pass, or where people get it?

      1. It’s apparently called Movie Pass and at movie pass dot com. I live in the Charlotte, NC area. Looks like there are about 3 theaters in this area that participate so far….

        One (an AMC Regal theater) is just a few miles from me, so maybe I’ll give this a try. ๐Ÿ™‚

        it might be rolling out more in other areas, seemed like NYC might have a lot more theaters.

      2. I just looked it up. The theatre I go to is a participating location, so I just might do it. Could be a nice way to unwind after the gym. Thanks for sharing! ๐Ÿ˜„

      3. I heard that another movie chain is going to offer a competing service.

        Competition is good.

        Iโ€™m out for a weekly live music thing solo tonight.

        I went to yoga (in the woods) here at the White Water Center, a charlotte thing.

        Live music outdoors after.

        Iโ€™d add that I am in a committed relationship, not married (neither of us want that again), but still out solo listening to music.

        Just enjoying the sounds, people watchinga bit, sitting near the water, watching a lot of dogs passing by.

        I share this because in my former married life years ago, I did not fully appreciate the healthy benefits of getting out alone.

        I tried to do everything with my ex and if either one of us werenโ€™t feeling it, then we suffered through it or suffered through not going at all.

        Doing things solo is as important for people in relationships as for those that choose not to be. ๐ŸŒž๐Ÿ™๐Ÿผ

  4. I have set “alone-goals” this year: one thing each month. There’s so much I want to do and not enough people who want to do them with me! So I have no choice, but since I’ve always been a bit insecure of myself I see it as a challenge. I have been out for coffee on my own and loved it, as well as going to the cinema (I am totally with you on that one!).
    I figured, I always go running on my own, why not do other stuff? It’s not like I am bad company to myself :p

    1. That’s amazing. You should stick with it. I find that the better we are at entertaining ourselves, the more interesting we become overall. People who have to be in the company of others to have a good time are usually pretty boring, because the pressure is often on someone else to make the time worth it.

      1. True. Plus caring too much what others think is a massive energy-drainer. I rather be at ease with myself than never be able to be alone.

    1. Thank you! I have a great time taking myself out on play dates. I do it at least once per week. Just got back from a solo trip to the gym. ๐Ÿ™ƒ

    1. Thanks Danni! I must confess though that sometimes I leave them at home even when they can make it ๐Ÿ˜‚

  5. โ€œThe man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait until that other is ready, and it may be a long time before they get off.โ€
    โ€• Henry David Thoreau
    โ€œI find it wholesome to be alone the greater part of the time. To be in company, even with the best, is soon wearisome and dissipating. I love to be alone. I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude.โ€
    โ€• Henry David Thoreau, Walden

    1. Ha! Clearly Thoreau and I should be blossom buddies, if ever he is resurrected. I am suspicious of people who cannot be happy alone. If you can’t enjoy your own company, why should I?

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