Did you know this about Jamaica?
Round 2! Thanks to everyone who contributed some patois!
Just because it looks like English -- doesn't mean it is.
I had my first day off in a year and a half. I'd say that counts for something.
It was a bleak day at the turn of autumn. Thunder roared portentously in the skies overhead, while a torrent of rain drenched the yard and turned it to mud. The wind had just picked up. It took hold of the trees and shook them until a fresh layer of soggy leaves had littered the dampened [...]
I know, I know. At this point, you're thinking we're criminals and there's no justifiable reason for what we did - but hear me out. In a moment you'll see that we had no better option at the time.